Wastebaskets & Physics Homework

it's halloween everyone!
happy halloween!


so another migraine today.
ugh.
hopefully no rebounds 
tomorrow.


so my sister and i 
have always wanted to live
together when we get older.
being architect's daughters 
we have always loved the art
of homes and interior design.
so this weekend,
we had gone to barnesnnobles 
and we looked through many books on home styles.
i've made a basic blue print as to
how i want it to look and be oriented.
i love provencal living.
houses that look very european have always stuck out to me.
blue shuddered windows,
double doors,
green vines climbing up the sides,
blah blah blah.
so i've designed a building,
where it's literally just two houses,
connected by one room,
the kitchen.
so kira and i can always be near each other,
and at the same time live separately to
prepare for (maybe) families.
i've always imagined kira to be the first to get married.
i just want to be work devoted and a good aunt.
like one of those great aunts
who brings back awesome toys 
and is really cool.
when i grow up,
i want to own two big dogs,
and of course others, 
but i can just see myself with
an irish setter and 
a siberian husky (the blonde and blue eyed ones). 
but 
as far as blueprints go,
my dad (the architect aka bob russ)
is going to sit down with us soon
and make official designs.
so excited.
and i want 
to have a nice backyard filled with lavender.
it'll be beauteous!
i want big windows too.
because i think nicely lighted houses 
are extremely divine. 
and i've always imagined
that i would have people over a lot.
friends are always fun.
so yeah, 
there's my future.
kira's going to become an engineer
and i will be an english teacher/andor/columnist.
at least one of us will be mostly successful.


ps. if i'm ever getting married, it'll be to either a british or australian or french man. no exceptions :P. 
ps. that's not real. 
ps. it actually is.
ps. it's up to you to decide. 
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Picture of the Day

this is what i mean!

blonde and blue eyed,

well not in this picture,

siberian husky.

it will be mine. 

Visible Breathe & Hemp Notebooks

so right now,
i'm watching 
finding bigfoot.
so amazing.
"this is squatchy"


so it's halloween tomorrow!
who's all excited?!
halloween is such a strange holiday.
at least to me it is.


so i am a notebook person.
if you know what i mean.
i carry around a particular  notebook,
that i write literally anything in.
thoughts,
rambles,
notes,
school work,
things-to-do,
doodles,
drawings,
etc.
and recently,
i filled mine up.
it's the first notebook i've ever filled.
filled up notebooks have so much character.
so yesterday 
i went out to get another.
this one is a recycled one,
with a hemp cover,
and thick homemade paper.
i think it will be nice to use with watercolor doodles.
it's everything i've ever 
thought in the old one.
so it's sad to start over.
but it just means
"another chapter in my life."
cliche isn't it?
oh well.
it's a good way to exert feelings.


i'm thinking of getting my permit soon.
i've been 16 since last march,
and i just don't care for driving.
i have a bus pass,
i don't have to pay for gas with it,
plus it's eco friendly.
but now my dad has a new car,
and my mom's planning on getting a new one too.
that leaves our old car "toby". 
my mom's thinking of giving him to me.
so with that i have 
more of a reason to drive.
it's so weird.
i don't feel 16. 
i never feel 16. 
i don't want to be 16.


"maybe you should kiss someone nice, or lick a rock, or both."
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Picture of the Day

not just one photo

but four!

these are a few recent doodles 

i've done to fill up the old notebook.

comments?

Candied Apples & Carpets

so it's been a few day's since i've posted.
my apologies.
it's been getting really busy around here.
school work and all.


so tonight is more pumpkin carving 
but instead at my moms.
we were supposed to start this afternoon.
but instead we just ran around 
doing errands.
we went to soergel today.
and i got my first candied apple!
haven't tried it yet though.
waiting to finish ramen dinner 
then eat it for dessert.
I think candied apples are really pretty,
and my mom raves about their 
significance in her childhood.
hopefully it's all i dreamed.


i also got to feed a few animals.
a donkey
a goat
a pig
and a bunny.
i liked the donkey the best.
his name was noah. 


so i've filled up my journal. 
or actually
i have two more pages.
but still it's an accomplishment 
for me.
i never used to fill them up.
or rarely use even 5 pages.
but i filled it up
with thoughts
and drawings
and doodles.
mostly rambles too.
but whats been keeping me from 
posting is drawing.
i've gotten out of my 
artist block
and finally started making art again.
art is what i was born to do.
it simply makes life beautiful.


it snowed today!
don't read that 
as if i were sounding excited about it.
i'm not.
i hate snow.
and i hate the cold.
i wish i could hibernate.
like a bear
or a squirrel.


I was listening to 
Obla-di-obla-da
by 
The Beatles.
and i realized how much i like the name Marli.
for a girl at least. 
i like names.
they are nice:


Yvienne     Lys     Noa     Knox     Saria     Rune     Feo


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Picture of the Day

isn't strange?

that i have never been to a lavender field 

and yet i want to return to one?

Ceramic Dust & Conformist Shoes

so 
another migraine today.
i wish 
i could 
swap brains with someone.
but still remain myself.
i hate them.
so much.


for a long time,
i was like all those other
girls. 
i tried to dress
so that 
they would like me.
i tried to act
so that they would like me.
but soon,
i 
realized,
how much
i could
care
less.
i am 
who i am.
i dress
the way i want to.
i act
the way i want to.
and none of it
is to impress anyone.
i do it 
for myself.
and i think
maybe,
some 
should think 
the same way.
love yourself.
be yourself.
trust me,
it's much more fun that way.
do things to make
YOU happy.
no one else.
hell,
shave your head,
wear overalls,
take ugly photos,
whatever. 
(hah, everything i do...)
i also think
that it's much 
easier to 
live that way.
being you.
i'm me.
and i love it.
and i 
know 
that i have
plenty of friends
who love 
me for it too.


okay,
phew 
done with that.
I've officially finished
my ceramics project!
it's very
zen.
once it's
bisque fired,
i'll glaze it.
pretty excited.


i can't believe this weeks
already started.
weekends never last.
i need more excitement 
during my school days.
the weather is
really going against me. 


lately 
i've been thinking
about
many 
existentialistic 
ideas,
what happens after death,
what is beyond space,
who else is like me.
my mother
thinks my mind
wanders to far away 
lands.
of course
it does. 
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Picture of the Day

i really love npr,

and "this american life"

and storycorps did a 

great book on just 

stories of real life people.

read it if your intrigued. 

Wild Flower Crowns & Cat Eyes

pumpkin carving
took place
at the 
russ residence 
today!
i carved for so long.
one of my best designs yet!
hopefully it doesn't 
get stolen,
like last years. 
(-_-;)


today was a pretty 
relaxed day.
last night i went to a 
halloween party.
i watched 
the expendables for 
about the
first
hour and a half. 
great movie.
lots of 
great 
fight scenes.
i love
fight scenes.
plus one of them
had an australian 
accent.
so
good.


i love to rake 
leaves.
last weekend 
i raked 
for about 3 and a half
hours.
by myself.
its so fun
rakin leaves
in the cool air,
while blasting 
a playlist off of my ipod.
the atmosphere 
is so melancholy.
then i started getting hungry.
so i made
a fire.
and roasted hotdogs,
outside,
by myself.
my mom came home
and told me
that i looked like a 
homeless person. 


in The Beatles song,
day in the life,
the one 
lyric
"found my way up the stairs and took a smoke
and someone spoke and i fell into a dream" 
then it just has this moment where
John Lennon 
just sings,
"aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
and as i was listening to it the other day,
i realized that 
that lyric 
is equal to my mind
24/7.
i'm an avid daydreamer.
constantly falling out of the universe 
and landing in some far away place.
flower child.
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Picture of the Day

my pumpkin for the year! 

how's it look?!

Silly Feelings & Cold Feet

so 
kira
bob russ
and i 
successfully went 
pumpkin picking today!
i wore my 
overalls that didn't clasp on the one strap,
a red t-shirt
and my 
big
bulky
timberland wanna-be
boots.
i was truly feeling the farm atmosphere.
My pumpkin is
slightly green. 
he looks like he has green veins.
he's particularly round-ish.
kira got a happy pumpkin
who is perfectly "wide and spherical"-kira
tomorrow we plan 
to carve away at them.


funny fact about the russ family.
we get 
EXTREMELY
crafty when it comes to creative holidays.
which equals to just easter and halloween.
for easter, 
we bring out the fancy paper,
14 boxes of the fun things to do to eggs
such as tie dye, metallic, sparkles, etc.
we also have two hot glue guns that.
our eggs 
are
the finest
in the
land.
and so are our pumpkins.
we always go up to granna's house.
so 
me
kira
bob russ
and uncle todd
sit down
gut all the pumpkins
(saving the seeds of course to roast later)
and begin to artistically 
carve the vegetables. (fine, gourds)
its
a jolly time.
bob russ
and 
uncle todd
particularly get into it,
always trying to show up 
what they had done last year.
it will be interesting to see 
what this years 
will be like.


families can be funny
depending on who you are.
i always 
tend to hear
about 
the troubles and struggles 
in the families
of my friends.


my family has gone through a divorce.
4 years ago.
for the first two years,
i was filled with anger
and sorrow
and despair.
it was all that i could think about.
not a day went past that i didn't.
my family was perfect.
at least throughout my happy childhood i thought so.
and even now,
i still believe that.
it took me two years,
to finally figure out
that it was all 
for the better.
my father laughed more,
my mother smiled more. 
and after all that,
i can say,
that i have grown so much from it.
i love my family to death.
my sister
my father
my mother
my uncle
my grandmother
and my two deceased grandfathers.


so you should 
always
take the time
to truly wonder
if it's really okay
to continue fighting
and screaming.
let yourself be happy.
life is much more fun that way.
trust me
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Picture of the Day

today, i found the book "awkward family photos" and this was 

my favorite.

Thumbelina People and Shared Meals

i'm running late on this.
i apologize.
today was a very busy busy busy day.


so today,
i've officially decided that 
i'm back on my feet,
no more crying,
no more thinking,
just smiling like i used to,
and being happy again. 
and i think saying 
that i was sad,
aloud,
was one of many solutions.
if your sad,
it's never acceptable to hold it in.
don't let yourself grow 
more and more
desperate to scream out loud.
just do it!
scream,
cry,
and gasp,
until you've had your fill of it.
that was me for 
two 
whole
weeks.
i'm sick and tired of being sad.
always have
always will.
so i took my happiness back,
and now,
i'm me again!
yay!
today 
i was just so filled up with 
good feelings.
i worked hard in classes,
(well except math...we had a test. ugh)
and today was just filled with laughter.


freshman year,
in majors,
my class got along so well.
we all were happy.
at least that's what i believe.
but sophmore year,
i can say
was a little rough.
but i think that's the way a family is too.
today,
in ceramics,
we had an open studio after school
to quickly finish our projects to meet our deadline.
and the few of us that were there,
we all laughed,
and giggled about 
different things.
i felt like we hadn't been that way for a while.
perfect harmony.
and we even went out to dinner 
(well pizza)
and we still laughed and talked.
i loved it.
and i hope it stays that way among us.
it makes going to school even more worthwhile.
perfect harmony is hard to achieve.
but i think many of us,
love being together.
once again,
at least i do.


i realized how much i love "pitter-patter" shoes.
it's a bit of a self made concept.
to me
"pitter-patter" shoes,
are the shoes you wear,
and when you walk around in the 
mezzanine or the marble floors of the main library,
your feet make little 
"pitter-patter" noises.
i think it's such a jolly thing.
i purposely wear shoes to the library 
that will
make
"pitter-patter" noises.
flats are the best especially. 
i used to own this pair of red flats
that fit tightly around my feet.
and daintily would prance around 
(ballerina feet for you dancers out there)
on the floors of the library.
it was even better if it was during the summer
and i was wearing the dress.
it made the experience even more magical to me.
does anyone else have weird quirky things about them too?
oh! and i love walking barefoot.
especially when there are stepping stones in a lawn.
they make "pitter-patter" noises too.


well that's it for today!
tomorrow i will be off to the farm to pick up some pumpkins!


i hope that this was worthwhile!
thank you to the few who've expressed 
their feelings towards 
my postings. 
at first,
i wasn't quite sure what to do with this blog.
but now,
i'm feeling even more confident!
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Picture of the Day

so being the daughter of an architect, i have an eye for GREAT

architectural studies like this. i'm especially a fan for watercolors. i love everything about this piece. 

thought i'd share!

Movies Started at Mid-way and Long Socks

so right now. 
i'm watching 
inglorious bastards.
and i started it,
halfway through.
so at the moment,
i am trying to be up to par
with what exactly is happening.
and why.


oh,
brad pitt just head-butted a guy.
head-butts are always great to see.
especially when brad pitt is doing it. 
plus he's got a great accent.


anywhoo.
school was good today. 
especially majors.
and oh 
lunch was extra fun.
but tomorrow,
is filled with 
two tests,
and so much homework. 


So winter is upon us.
time to bring out my 
long socks and
comforters.
oh and my kotatsu.
a kotatsu is this japanese heater table.
under the table top is this heavy fluffy sheet i have.
and theres a little 
(i just found out that inglorious bastards is a quentin tarantino movie. no wonder there's scalping! it makes so much more sense!!!)
heater under the table.
so when you stick your legs under the table, 
your nice and warm.
i love it.
i like to stick my entire body under it.
and take naps.


crap.
it's 9:58.
grr.


so back to winter.
i hate winter.
i hate snow especially.
i hate being in it.
waking up,
having to get out of bed freezing cold,
then having to miserably  
go outside
and go to school. 
plus your all bundled up in your down jacket,
then you get on a bus,
where they turn the heating on to the max.
and your standing, 
with a heavy book-bag on your back,
its crowded,
and you 
CAN'T
take off your coat.
i hate it so much. 


but i do enjoy going out and cutting down the tree for christmas.
classic. 
and it was always really nice because it was a family outing. 
now it's just with my dad. 
but still it's fun.
last year,
we came home to my mom's,
only to find the tree
completely collapsed on the ground.
it was kind of funny. 


winter means new years too!
i always thought new years wasn't that big of a deal.
but for the past few,
i've been spending them with friends.
normally,
easter
christmas
thanksgiving and all
i spend with family.
but i feel like new years is just one of those holidays,
that's really fun.
what a great excuse to hang out late with friends.
not that i don't do that enough already.


but i have always preferred summer over winter.
wearing dresses
and feeling grass beneath my feet. 
summer makes me miss my long hair.
when i could keep it down,
and let it go with the wind.
wind is divine
is it not?


well. 
bob russ 
says it's bed time.
he won't let me watch the rest of avatar.
thank god it's friday tomorrow.
pumpkin picking at hozak's saturday!
woo hoo!
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Picture of the Day

Voila! Know you know what a kotatsu is!